2007 ANGELS NICKNAME KEY

One of the biggest challenges we have encountered in maintaining this blog is the difficulty of attracting readers. I think one of the main reasons for this is our love of nicknames, nicknames 99.9999% of the general popluation don't understand. So, in an effort to de-alienate (is this a word?) our potential readers, I have devised a nickname key. Whenever a name stumps you and you have no clue who we're talking about, peruse the key and find out. Sound easy? It's as easy as the other side of the pillow. Or something.

2007 ANGELS NICKNAME KEY

Pitchers

Hector Carrasco = Hector Fiasco

Bartolo Colon = Barcholo Cologne

Kelvim Escobar = Lambo

John Lackey = His Lackness

Dustin Moseley = Sugar Shane

Darren Oliver = Cousin Oliver

Chris Resop = Poser, Resop Choi

Francisco Rodriguez = Frod

Ervin Santana = Magic

Joe Saunders = Barry Saunders

Scot Schields = Doug E. Fresh, One T

Justin Speier = Just Inspire, Justin's Pyre

Jered Weaver = The Good Weaver

Catchers

Jeff Mathis = Johnny

Jose Molina = JoMo

Mike Napoli = Mo'Napoli

Infielders

Erick Aybar = Erick Gaybar

Orlando Cabrera = Cabfare for Cutie, Cabfare, The Big O

Chone Figgins = Fignuts

Shea Hillenbrand = Che Hillenbrand, Shea Hey

Maicer Izturis = Mice Hair

Howie Kendrick = Kenny Howdrick

Casey Kotchman = Crotch Goblin

Dallas McPherson = JR, Chiropractor's Best Friend

Kendry Morales = MORE-Alice

Robb Quinlan = Baby Face, Quinny The Pooh

Outfielders

Garret Anderson = Sit & Sleep, Caddy, Night Train

Nick Gorneault = Dick Porno

Vladimir Guerrero = Vlad

Gary Matthews Jr. = Gary Matthews Juicer

Tommy Murphy = Captain Murphy

Juan Rivera = Johnny Rivers

Reggie Willits = Reggie and the Full Effect

Coaches

Mike Scioscia = Mike Chocha

Ron Roenicke = Enterprise Roenicke (He'll pick you up)

Alfredo Griffin = Fettuccine

Dino Ebel = Bam-Bam

Mickey Hatcher = Dumb ass

Mike Butcher = Sam (Haha, two Brady Bunch references in our list of nicknames. Cool!)

Orlando Mercado = The Market

Steve Soliz = NONE

Non-roster invitees

Chris Bootcheck = Fat Tire, Bootcheck Bootcheck Ghali

Matt Hensley = Sherman Hensley

Alex Serrano = Pedro Serrano

Mike Eylward = The L Word

Brandon Wood = NONE (HELP!)

Nathan Haynes = Haynes His Way

Curtis Pride = Deaf Cab for Curtis, Pride (In the name of love)

There you have it. I am open to all suggestions and help on the ones I forgot.

You Know What To Do, Lackey...

"But this time," Guillen, 30, says, "I have the chance to get even. My motivation is Anaheim. I hope those fans boo me. That just makes me better. I want to show those people what they're missing.

Is Hoagie serious? I really hope Lackey beans him, gets tossed, Doug E. Fresh come in, beans him, gets tossed, followed by Frod beaning him and getting tossed. The suspensions would be worth it.

Here's the rest of his diatribe.

the baseball diaries *spring training edition*

That was awesome!

After a year away, this was the best time I've had at Angels Spring Training. The food, the sights, the sounds, the girls. It was great! A couple Angels that stood out to me so far were Fignuts, Kenny Howdrick, and His Lackness. Both had great games on Sunday; Lackey looked sharp on the mound, Fignuts was great at 3rd, and Howie was awesome at the plate.

Besides the baseball action, just the whole atmosphere was great this year. Lots of families, lots of opportunities to get minor league autographs because of the way the facilities are set up. We even got Ryne Sandberg's autograph! Did I mention the food? I can only wish Angels Stadium brings on half of what was available: Philly cheesesteaks, all kinds of sausages, italian ice, there was even a gyros joint at the Mariner facility.

I seriously can't wait for the season to start. Can't wait to "Turn on the TV, and turn down my pulse."

dil8d halo

Springtime Musings

Today is Monday. On Thursday, we will be in beautiful Tempe, Arizona, working on our sunburns and watching Angels baseball. In the meantime, I have compiled a list of players that have impressed me and pissed me off so far this spring. I'll do a revised list when I get back to see how on target I was.

HITTERS

HIGH-FIVE:

1. Erick Gaybar: 5-for-6 on Saturday, a home run yesterday. Mice Hair better watch out or he may be learning the ways of the Mormons before long.

2. Kenny Howdrick: Batting .500 so far in the spring. Ho-hum. He'll hit .300 this season, guaranteed.

3. Reggie Willits: Let's think of a new nickname for him this weekend, please. The Diff'rent Strokes reference is too easy. Reggie's hitting, running, diving, etc. so far this spring. Captain Murphy may be the odd man out.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!:

1. Johnny Mathis: Uhhhh, Jeff? Didn't you used to be a top prospect? I'm pretty sure Mathis couldn't hit the coach pitching in Alex's league right now. He's 1-for-19 this spring. Yuck.

2. Gary Matthews Juicer: I hated him before he was an Angel, I hated him when he signed with the Angels, and now I hate how he's cowering behind his agent and Robert Shapiro in this whole HGH situation. And I REALLY hate how he's not hitting at all this spring.

PITCHERS

HIGH-FIVE:

1. Pedro Serrano: He's no spring chicken, but he's looking pretty good so far, notching 3 saves in as many chances. He won't make the club, but he's nice to have in reserve.

2. Fat Tire: The front-runner for the last bullpen spot, Fat Tire has done an outstanding job so far. I really, really hope he makes the team and excels. He has it in him.

3. Sugar Shane Moseley: Five shutout innings yesterday with the B squad playing behind him. I'm not a huge fan of the guy, but he's been worth his salt so far.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!:

1. Chris Poser: He doesn't deserve two nicknames, but I am unveiling the new nickname of Resop Choi for us to use from now on. With that said, I hope we don't have to use it much because I hope he isn't in Anaheim, at least not this April. Poser has given up 12 runs in 6 innings and has just looked awful. We traded Geek X for him!?!

2. Phil Seibel: New nickname? How about Crappy Lefthander? Ten runs in 5 innings so far. And we traded The Don for him.

Bratwurst awaits...

Worthy Thoughts About Worthless Angels

This week's Worthy Thoughts entry is journeyman third baseman Dave Hollins. If you look at his career as a whole, Hollins was a serviceable player in his 12 big league seasons, in which he played for seven different teams. He was hard-nosed, he played on the '93 National League Champion Phillies, he played with diabetes, etc. However, it was his two-year stint with the Angels that leaves a bad taste in my mouth.

Hollins wasn't horrible with the Angels, but he frustrated me more than anyone else on that team, more than the Big O and Ross from Friends combined. The dude ended more big innings than anyone on the team, constantly striking out or popping up, which caused my face to go into more contortions than Max Patkin.

In the field Hollins was even more of a disaster. Whether it was Rickey Henderson or Florence Henderson running to first base, he would wind up and fire the ball to first base with no accuracy whatsoever. They really should have held a "Dave Hollins Hard Hat" promotion at the Big A, because sitting in the first-base seats was a concussion waiting to happen.

My "favorite" encounter with Hollins came on Memorial Day, 1997. A few of us were waiting by the players parking lot to snag an autograph or two and Mr. Hollins walks up.

WiseAndEck: Mr. Hollins, do you have time to sign an autograph?

Hollins: Shouldn't you be in school?

WAE: Sir, it's Memorial Day.

Hollins: But still...

Thank you for that memory, Dave Hollins, and this blog entry is your reward.

TW Hit List - Rogers Hornsby

"People ask me what I do in winter when there's no baseball. I'll tell you what I do, I stare out the window and wait for spring."

It’s been said that Rogers Hornsby was a player whose well-attested all around brilliance was apparently only matched by his capacity to aggravate those around him. But we will honour the dead and only speak of his on-field brilliance, of which there is plenty to say. And for the record, Williams himself says that Hornsby was a coach of his in the Red Sox farm system and “Hornsby treated me as well anybody could have treated me.” In his book, The Science of Hitting, Williams highlights his golden rule: get a good pitch to hit. But he confesses that he learned this from Hornsby during his farm days. And judging from the numbers, Hornsby got a lot of good pitches to hit.

Hornsby was not an obvious talent growing up, or even in the minors. But when came up to the bigs, he broke out. After a .313 rookie season in 1916 playing all four infield spots (he eventually played Short and Third), he established himself as one of the best of the game. He won the NL batting title from 1920 to 1925 and the Triple Crown in 1922 and 1925. Only he and Williams have won the Crown twice. The stretch of seasons he put together from 1921 to 1925 have got to be one of the more remarkable stretches in baseball history. He hit over .400 three times, hitting .424 in 1924, the highest single season average in the twentieth century. He was MVP twice in this time and even more, he took over managing his St. Louis Cardinals in 1925 and led the team to World Series victory in 1926 in a huge upset over the Yankees. (Interestingly, the only World Series to end on a caught stealing when Hornsby laid the tag on Ruth at second base.) After this season, he was rewarded by being traded.

Hornsby finished his career batting .358, second only to Ty Cobb and the best ever by a right-hander. Unlike Cobb though, he had some pop. He hit 301 home runs and a career 1.010 OPS. They say “Rajah” had a fantastically keen eye and the glories of baseball lore give us all the evidence we need: Once, after three consecutive called balls to Hornsby, a brash rookie pitcher complained loudly to umpire Bill Klem only to watch as his fourth delivery landed in the distant bleachers. Klem patiently explained to the young rookie, “When the ball is over the plate young man, Mr. Hornsby will let you know.”

I Love (Spring Training) Opening Day

Ahhh, nothing like the first spring training game of the season. Nothing like three innings of the starters, followed by six innings of players you've never heard of - but I have. Today marks the first game of the 2007 season for the Angels, as they go up against last year's Little League World Series runner-up, the Kaci Royals. Magic and his nose bleeds takes the hill versus Brian Bannister, the son of one-time Angels retread Floyd Bannister.

Should be a blast. I'll be watching GameTracker and posting my thoughts as the game goes on.

My prediction for first Angels home run ... Mike Napoli. Feel free to prognosticate as well.